Broken Heart Rehab

Posts Tagged ‘broken heart’

Nothing is worst than going into a new relationship with the emotional scars of a past breakup on your mind. They can weigh heavy on one’s mind, and even create friction in a new relationship where there should otherwise be none.

Our recommendation to you is "be kind, please rewind."

Here is what we mean…

Before entering into a new relationship, "rewind" your mind to the place you were before times got tough in your past relationship.

Let go of fear, and open your heart to the prospect of connecting with someone new. It is also important to let go of assumptions. In fact, the only assumption that you should make is that your current significant other is not like your ex. Remember that all people handle issues differently, and just because your ex behaved one way does not mean that every person will act in the same manner.

So, next time you find yourself building emotional walls or making assumptions about one’s behavior based your ex, hit stop and rewind. It’s the kind (and fair) thing to do!

2009 showed that even celebrities are not immune to a broken heart. Here are the top ten celebrity breakups of 2009:

1. Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins So sad. Can’t believe this long standing power couple split.
2. Robyn and Mel Gibson Thought these two would last. She put up with lots of his crap and still stayed. I’m sure their attorneys made out like bandits during this divorce.
3. Rosie O’ Donnell and Kelli Carpenter These two seemed to be a very happy couple. Proves that you never know what goes on behind closed doors.
4. James Van Der Beek and Heather McComb We here at BHR love us some Dawson. But I guess Heather decided that Dawson should have ended up with Joey, not her.
5. Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley These two young rockers were very cute together. Unfortunately, their puppy love did not last.
6. Billy Joel and Katie Lee These two were the couple that wanted to prove that a dramatic age difference does not matter. Only they know what ultimately ended their relationship, but we know that Billy Joel will be Movin’ Out.
7. LeAnn Rimes and Dean Sheremet Amidst allegations that LeAnn was seeing Eddie Cibrian, these two finally called it quits. Dean filed for divorce. Our heart goes out to Dean.
8. Jimmy Kimmel and Sarah Silverman These two comics called it off after 5 long years of being together. We were hoping for a little comic-genius offspring but alas, no such luck.
9. Chris Evert and Greg Norman The two famous athletes (her-tennis and him-golf) decided that 15 months was long enough to be married and separated. Chris will have to find a new doubles partner.
10. Kate and John Gosselin ‘Nuff said

Making the decision to break up is a big one, and one that requires a lot of consideration. Keep in mind, however, that not all roads lead to a break up. There are times when a make-up is better than a break up. In trying to figure out whether you want to make (or break) the relationship, ask yourself the following:

•Can you forgive the person for what happened?
•Are you and your significant other willing to meet halfway to try to work on overcoming the recent relationship challenge?
•Do you honestly believe that you can move past and accept (without resentment) what happened between you and your significant other?

Remember that one of the benefits of being in a relationship with another person is to feel happy and grow.  If you can’t answer yes to either of the questions above, happiness and growth may me a problem.

If you answered no to any of the questions above, you should spend some time deciding and discussing with your significant other what’s in each of your respective best interests to make up or break up.

I know after a breakup you just want to stay inside of your apartment in your bed watching Days of Our Lives. Although I love me some Days, this is only healthy for a short time. You cannot get yourself fired over a breakup. It is so not worth it. You need to get out. You need to see that the sun still rises everyday. The world did not stop even though it does feel like that in your heart.

You need to work. Not just for the financial aspects but for the mental ones, too. It forces you to get out of the house and be around others. Although this do not sound appealing at all right now, it is so important. Human interaction is crucial at this time. Notice I say human because your dog does not count. Fido might be great to help you through but you need others. You need to talk to others.

Now this brings up a sticky situation. You should not be in your office spending countless hours talking to your co-workers or, God forbid, your boss about your breakup. You can let them know that you have broken up with your significant other and you are having a hard time but you will do your best to leave it outside of the office. This is professional and it will let them know that you may not be 100% but you are going to try to put it aside for the 8 hours you are in your place of work. And honestly, during a breakup, how great is it to have 8 hours of any distraction.  Pretty good, right.  Eight less hours that you will not be just wallowing in self-pity. 

Right now work is good for you.  Get out there, be productive and who knows, you might just find Mr. or Ms. Right in the elevator, on the subway, at Starbucks, or even on the way to your job!

We know it’s hard to get back on the dating scene after taking a hiatus! A million questions run through your mind: Will he or she like me? Do I look desperate? What do I say?  Those questions can be debilitating for someone who is ready to get on the scene but suffers from trepidation! We’ve put together some simple, quick "pick-up" strategies to help you get out of a slump.

Setting: Gym

1. Bad: stare longingly at that gym hottie from afar
2. Good: Ask her or him to spot you, or if they’ve ever taken a class
3. Awesome: Ask to spot her or him, or to join you for a class

Setting: Barnes and Noble or some other book store

1. Bad:  Avoid eye contact at all costs.
2. Good:  Ask the cutie about the book she or he is reading
3. Awesome: Grab the same book, and tell her or him that they have excellent taste

Setting: Bar/Restaurant

1. Bad: Hide out in the corner with your friends
2. Good: send her or him a drink
3. Awesome: send her or him an appetizer to share with friends