Walking is a great way to heal a broken heart. Not only is it heart-healthy, but it is a great way to heal the mind through meditation and reflection upon a relationship. It does not (typically)require the endurance running or other “heeling” activities, so it is easy to put on your comfiest shoes and just let your mind and body wander.

Take the time to breathe. Take the time to think. Take the time to reflect. Just take the time for you.

Healing after a break up is not easy. Adopting new rituals and doing things to heal your heart are more important than ever. Using your heels to heal your heart is just one thing that we suggest to help you do that.

If you find yourself single during the holidays, what should you do? Well, we will tell you. Here is our list of the top 10 things to do for the holidays if you are single:

1.Find other single friends and hit the town. This is a great time to celebrate whatever holiday it is with other people that are looking to mingle.

2.Dress for the holiday. We are not saying to dress head-to-toe like a leprechaun but a cute button that says “Kiss Me, I’m Irish” is always appropriate. Plus, it will invite people to talk to you.

3.Throw a party. Tell everyone you invite to invite at least one single male or female friend. This way you will have a new diverse group that you can celebrate with and who knows you may even make a love connection.

4.Volunteer. Find a charity that is doing something for the holiday you are celebrating and donate your time. This is a great way to make you feel better and meet new people.

5.Bring cookies or baked goods to your cute neighbor and let him know you just wanted to be festive. The way to a man’s heart is through yummy cookies.

6.Dress up your dog and bring him or her to a dog park. This will be a great way for people to start up conversations with you. If you don’t have a dog, borrow a friend’s.

7.Check out your local paper online for fun activities to do in your area. Try something new that you have always wanted to try. Bring a single friend and make it a contest to see who can talk to the most people.

8.Run a holiday race. Lots of holidays have races built around them. This is a great way to workout and to interact with some really good looking, in-shape people.

9.Go on a trip. Find a fun place that you think other singles will flock to and head out of town with a friend. Ask a travel agent or scour the internet for places that unattached people are headed for a good time.

10.Do something special for yourself. Go get a massage, take a long bubble bath or get a mani/pedi. Read a book. Whatever makes you happy. You need to treat yourself with kindness and love. You are special and deserve to be treated like the prince or princess you are.

This is common for people who are living solo. Not having a constant companion to bounce ideas and stories off of can be strange, especially if you have been used to doing that in the past. But here at BHR, we have a few ways to help ease those not-so-great days.

1. Start a “Good Day” journal.

Writing down your feelings when you are sad is easy. How about keeping a journal only for the days that you feel good? When you are happy and feeling great about your single life, write it down. Document what you love about it. When you are having sad day, reference your “Good Day” journal. Remind yourself of your positive emotions.
2. Challenge your thoughts.

It is easy to get into a mental routine. This means to repeat the same thoughts and emotions over and over. Next time you find yourself going to the same negative thought that you have been having for a long time, challenge it with a different thought. Make these thoughts mirrors, and completely reverse your feeling on it.
3. Adopt a pet.

If you do not have a pet, now may be a great time to get one. Animals bring much life into a home, and are wonderful companions! Your local shelter will have many animals that are in need of a good home, and knowing that you rescued a life will bring much joy to your heart! If you feel you are not ready for the responsibility of an animal, plants and flowers in your home will bring life into it.
4. Create a list of your perfect mate.

Make a list of ten things that you want out of a partner. Be as specific as possible. This list will be your guide. If you begin dating, see how your date matches this list. Do not compromise and stay as true to what you desire as possible.

Being single can be a very exciting time in your life! Know that it is common and ok to have lonely days. But remember; the one thing worse than being alone is wishing that you were alone.

I know at the beginning of a relationship you push aside those ugly things that this hot girl/guy has hidden in their not-so-deep closet. But don’t. These nasty little traits are there as warnings. You need to objectively evaluate them. You need to step back, clear your love-struck head and determine if you can really see yourself dealing with these issues a year down the road. Because I promise you, the traits that this person has will not change. You cannot change a person. Just like the old saying goes, “A leopard does not change his spots.”

Ask yourself what your core beliefs are. What is important to you? What is something you are not willing to compromise on? Things like a guy’s hair color, his build and what kind of car he drives are not things that should figure into your core values. However, religion, whether that person wants a family and their lifestyle choices should be some of the things that you zero in on. These things need to be in line with your values. If they are not, you are just creating a world of hurt for yourself.

One of the many ways to not have your heart broken is to go into a relationship knowing that the two of you have core beliefs and values that are very similar. You want to spend your life with someone that believes the same things you do. You don’t need to agree on everything but you do need to see eye to eye on the big stuff. No one wants to spend their life arguing and angry. Once the honeymoon phase wears off, you will have to deal with these issues. Make sure you have set the ground work for a long-lasting, happy relationship where you are growing together and not apart.

1. You only have to answer to yourself

2. You have more space and freedom to be "the real you"

3. Dating can actually be fun. I swear.

4. More time to focus on career, hobbies, etc.

5. It can be very liberating!

6. You are free to flirt

7. You can spend your money and time however you damn well please

8. You can decorate your pad the way you totally love it

9. Hanging out with your other single friends is a blast!

10. No need to explain yourself when you get home from the bar "too late"

Two important things to remember is:
A. Now is NOT the time to push your friends and loved ones away, and
B. Give yourself a well deserved break.

Regarding "A," this means that stay in contact with the ones that love you. I know it is easier to crawl into a hole and block out social contact, but this is counter-productive. When you are over the heartache (which you will be) those friends may not be around waiting for you. Sad, but true.

As far as "B," is concerned, give yourself a break. This could be a day at the park, a massage, or a frivolous shopping trip. It does not matter. You deserve to pamper yourself, and these acts of self kindness will nurture your soul.

So, two things to remember. Love yourself, and love those that love you.

Look we all have one shot at this thing called life.  You could waste a day being upset over some loser that doesn’t know what a good thing he is giving up on.  Or you can get out there, get back on the horse and ride into the sunset with Mr. Right (I couldn’t resist).  There is a good guy (or gal) out there for each of us.  We have to value ourselves enough to not settle for someone treating us like dirt and wasting our time (sorry, I’m on my own rant right now).  You need to believe that your soul mate is out there.  He wants to find you, just as bad as you want to find him.  Are you with me on this one!  Say, Go Team!!

So what have we learned from this ever informative post?  Drink!  Yippee!  Well, drink but in moderation because hangovers are not fun especially when you go overboard.  Ok, what is the more important lesson for today…Don’t stay with a jerk that doesn’t want to be with you.  Life is too short.  Find someone you want to be with and who wants to be with you.  He’s out there.  I know it.  Good luck, and let me know how it goes!!!

For a few weeks, I would sulk on Thursdays. I would even watch our shows and cry. But all that did was slow my healing process down. It wasn’t easy, but I created a new ritual for that night. Now, that is my night out with my girlfriends. It took some time, but what was once a painful day became a day I looked forward to.

What old habits are you hanging onto? Even more, do you still partake in them solo for the mere painful reminder? If so, I suggest you replace your old habits with your ex with new ones that are just for you. Do you want even more of a challenge? Then change it to something so different, you won’t even have a trace of your ex in it.

For example, was Monday night "movie night" from your past? Then now it is "bowling night", or "sushi rolling night". Don’t do anything that reminds you of your ex. You actually will start to enjoy your new routine that is custom made for the fabulous new you!

I know that when I feel this way, there is something I always tend to do. Call the ex. And I don’t mean my recent ex. I am talking about the ex ex! The one from before your last relationship.  Why do I do this? It is not because I want to get back together with them.  It is more like I feel “safe.”  This person already knows me and probably has some feelings. The bottom line? My ego needs a stroking! 

If your ex ex is not in a new relationship and you are up front with your intention (not get back together), than this can be harmless an actually a nice distraction for awhile. But if he or she has moved on, trotting on that territory is not cool and can lead to trouble. 

My advice? If you want some comfort from the ex ex, make sure you are in the same boat with each other. Otherwise, you are bound to paddle backwards.

Our recommendation to you is "be kind, please rewind."

Here is what we mean…

Before entering into a new relationship, "rewind" your mind to the place you were before times got tough in your past relationship.

Let go of fear, and open your heart to the prospect of connecting with someone new. It is also important to let go of assumptions. In fact, the only assumption that you should make is that your current significant other is not like your ex. Remember that all people handle issues differently, and just because your ex behaved one way does not mean that every person will act in the same manner.

So, next time you find yourself building emotional walls or making assumptions about one’s behavior based your ex, hit stop and rewind. It’s the kind (and fair) thing to do!